“Why am I here? What is my purpose? Do I even exist? Maybe this is all a dream, and this is not me, maybe I am not me, I am someone else? There are so many questions I want to ask… but how do I ask them? Should I pray? And if so – to whom?”
For the sake of tradition, I will present you with some of the general background regarding this… person. For the sake of tradition, we shall call this person a “he”. For the sake of tradition we shall give him a moniker. And against all tradition, we will call him Amiel.*
“If I pray, will my prayers be answered?”
Amiel is fairly young. Relatively young. Everything is relative. Let’s say he is in his early twenties. That sounds relatively acceptable. He is young, smart, and curious. Just like any human, he possesses many different emotions, feelings, thoughts, doubts, ideas… Just like any human, he is insecure, unstable at times. He makes mistakes, he tries to correct them. He goes through harsh crises – with his own self, with his creator, with his beliefs, with his faith. He goes through all the good and bad stuff that any human goes through.
He doesn’t remember his first steps, but he knows that he stumbled. It is just common knowledge that the young human being has to learn all that basic knowledge the hard way. First-hand. He doesn’t remember everything good or bad he has done. But someone remembers it. There is always someone who remembers even that little stupid thing that you did when you were 16, always at least one person. If you gathered the knowledge about yourself from all the people who have ever encountered you, you could probably reconstruct your life, albeit somewhat loosely and not entirely correctly – after all humans are imperfect and their memories tend to be selective…
Amiel tries to be perfect. Many of those who know him say he is. They trust him entirely. They ask him for advice; they tell him their secrets, fears, even ideas. They ask him for help.
Many of those who know him, say he is not perfect. Who knows, really? Define perfection!
There are those who hate him. And those, who don’t care about him. See? He is just like any human. Do you see the resemblance? Can you see yourself in his persona?
But right now, his mind is occupied with the very essence of his existence. He wants to understand it, but it always seems to slip away. How did he come to being? No, not physically, but the forces that brought him to life, his soul… what forces were these? And why?!
“If I don’t pray, will I ever know?”
He went through so many ideas about his existence. Things he knew, he guessed, he resented, he didn’t believe…
His lives were countless. He has had many reincarnations, more than anyone else. Many more. A myriad. What is even more peculiar, is that many of his reincarnations appear to subsist at the same time. Every now and then someone will take him for someone else. It’s an honest mistake, happens to everyone. Someone would go to him, and say, “Oh wait… sorry, I thought you were someone else… but you look just like him!” Maybe they are not reincarnations… just doppelgangers.
“What is His plan for me?”
Ah yes. We got to Him. Who is He? Again, for the sake of tradition, He will be a “he”. He is the creator. He is the one who created Amiel. Whether it was directly or indirectly, He made him. He made him in his own image. Whether it was intentional or not… who knows anyway!
To make a long (really long) story short, that is Amiel. Surrounded by all the white clouds, all the light, all the love… he looks down and prays to his creator. And he does have faith, he believes that He exists – surrounded by His wonderful world down there on the earth.
Just for a second let us go back to the beginning:
-And then, Man created God.
*Amiel – a name of Hebrew origin, meaning “God of my people”